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Wednesday, June 10, 2015

For the new teacher

One of my former music students talked to me about wanting to teach music lessons.  I couldn't be happier - he's a very talented musician, but he's also a great guy with a good sense of humor and a fair amount of patience.  At the same time, we are getting ready for our next black belt test opportunity at Han Mi Martial Arts.  While all of the people taking this test are under 18 and ineligible to be an instructor right now, they do have the ability to be leaders and informally help people learn.  These are some ideas I'd like to impart to those people looking to be teachers.

1) Each student is an opportunity.  Some will require a lot of work and have a lot of challenges.  You will get frustrated at times because you'll want to do good work for them and want them to succeed and the path won't be clear or seem possible.  Remember, this person is an opportunity for you to learn about your own patience and limitations and how to over come them.  Be consistent and optimistic - not because you're putting up a front, but because they truly are a gift to your community and there is a way through the problems with hard work and insight.

2) The student's needs come first. You are going to have all sorts of goals that you want to see out of people, but don't cut through the basics and the simple stuff in order to rush to the flashy stuff.  They aren't there for your ego, bank account, or need to vent.  They came there to learn and to be better people.  You can be friendly with students, but don't forget your role and don't forget to keep to that first and foremost.  Concern yourself with that goal primarily and the other things will fall into place.

3) Be consistent with goals and expectations.  Set a goal for the student and work to achieve it.  Don't get distracted by something you're interested in.  Which leads to...

4) Have an easily stated curriculum for what you teach.  In the name of all that's sacred, don't flail around trying to wing each class and make it up on the fly.  There is a space to tailor what you are doing to the student or to the situation, but you need to do that from the context of a solid curriculum.

5) Show them that you love this and that they matter to you!  Most of them aren't going to want to practice, do the grunt work of conditioning the body or the reflexes, or lay the groundwork that leads to solid skill later on.  It's your job to show them how these basics lead to things that are really wonderful.  Show them that you understand and don't be afraid to show them how this basic study will make things really smooth and great later on.  Show them the joy you have for even the mundane aspects of this study.

6) The moment the student comes through the door, it is important that you realize that they will someday walk out of that door and never return.  You'll need to let go at some point.  Do what you can to help, but don't try to own their successes and try to don't own them - neither are yours.

7) The moment someone meets you by taking classes with you - regardless of age or anything else, you must never see them romantically.  Plenty of people disagree with me here and that's fine.  My opinion is to never do it.  If you keep to that, then your work will never be compromised.  If that person is supposed to know you on another level outside of what you teach, then you would have met that person in that context; you didn't.  If you're single, then go outside of work to date - you need a larger support network than just your job anyway.  If you aren't single and are moving outside of your other relationship, then you are creating a very bad ethical example in your work and probably shouldn't be teaching in the first place.  That is extreme selfishness and it has no place in instruction.

8) Your skills in your field are not directly connected to your skills as a teacher.  Teaching is a skill all its own.  Have humility about learning this skill and listen to what your instructors, students, and other involved people are telling you.  With that, you need to remember to make the time to continue to progress yourself in whatever field you're giving instruction.  You not only teach techniques, but you also teach how to acquire them.

9) Teach as if they are going to do this for a living or if their life depended on it.  You never know what life will bring and neither do they.

10) If a student doesn't respect you, then confront it.  Talk to them and try to understand the issue.  If this person still doesn't respect you afterwards, then don't be afraid to encourage them to work with someone else.  If you've done your best and this person has a bad attitude, let them leave.  If you haven't caused a problem, then this is their issue to solve.  They came to you to learn and now haven't committed to that goal because something is distracting them.  Give them time if that's possible and continue to be positive and patient with them.  If their problems are causing you to hate your job or causing others to be distracted, then show this person to the nearest door.  Don't worry - the next person they work with will have the same problem you're having with them.  By that line of thinking, always be careful when getting someone into your teaching area from another teacher.  Make sure you aren't inheriting someone's past problem.

11) If you want your students to stay on good terms with you, then make sure you know how to stay on good terms with your teachers.  While not all of my old teachers are still close with me, most are.  Learn what it takes to keep those good relationships and make sure you create an environment for your students that makes it easy to keep that community positive.  It's good for business - sure.  It's also good for your life to make that connection with another person.  It's being a small part of someone's life in a way that is really beautiful.  When they nurture someone, they'll always think of you.  That's really beautiful and humbling.

12) Rome was not built in a day.  Be consistent, stay on the goal, and show these students how to approach difficult things with patience, intensity, and a sense of humor if things get too negative.

13) Encourage them to own their educational experience.  Make sure that you've taught them all the things that are part of their community (i.e. the basics).  Encourage them to look up things on their own and bring you any questions that they have about what they've seen.  This will help you to stay up to date as well.  This will also show them that they aren't on a little island studying something that is obscure.  Rather, that are part of a whole movement and a community.  This tends to help people that start to get big headed about their own skills to remember that there is always a proverbial bigger fish.

When in doubt about anything, ask yourself what will help the student.  This next thing is a scary thing to some people, but it is the only way I know how to convey it - forgive the awkwardness of my word choice here:  You must love the student.  To do this, you have to know what love is not; it doesn't own, it isn't angry, it isn't jealous, it isn't selfish, it doesn't isolate, and it doesn't cling to things.  It gives compliments without forgetting that there is always more to do.  It knows to sustain a person or a good situation, balance is very necessary.  If you keep to this and don't let your own interests get in the way, then there is very little you can do that will be harmful.  From there, it's just an issue of how effective you are in your teaching.

After you've done all of that, make sure people treat you honestly with the payment.  You will always have people try to talk down your price or get a special deal.  If you do that, then it's up to you.  However, be careful not to undersell your work.  If you are giving these people your best and you are helping them to succeed, then you deserve to be compensated reasonably.  If they disagree, then they don't appreciate the work you're doing.  Set a fair price and don't feel apologetic for getting paid.

Best of luck, David, and to everyone else that this helps!

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