Continuing with the series on ethics, the next topic is for one to be dedicated to their martial arts school. While it may seem awfully self-serving for a martial arts school to say that its students need to be dedicated to it, the intention is not a selfish one. It is a recognition of how a school grows, improves, and matures. While the main instructor of a school is vitally important to that school's growth and to it being sustained, each member has a role to play in that school's success. Through looking at how a school grows and improves, the rapport between the head instructor and the other members, and at the times when that dedication can be questioned, it is possible to understand why this ethical consideration of the martial artist is so important to the individual student as well as the school as a whole.
In order to understand this tenet's purpose, it is first important to define the concept of growth in the context of this posting. Growth, in the case of this use, does not necessarily mean more students. Many martial arts schools are also businesses and so there is often the goal of acquiring students. While it is useful to have different people to work with, growth in this way is not what I mean. Specifically, I'm talking about growth in terms of the quality of the training in the school. When I am using the word growth, I want to be clear that I don't mean growth of my wallet or my ego. Rather, I'm talking about growth in the overall experience for each person in the school. The quality of the sparring, the execution of forms, the improvement of the relationships within the school, and other issues along these lines are what I am talking about. If there is misunderstanding on this point, then people will think I have cheapened these ethical tenets to mean each student should help me make more money. While I am in business to make money, I am also in business to do the best work I can for each person. I don't hide that making money is part of any business, it is not something I expect others to add to their ethical outlook; that would be absurd to the point of being offensive. This tenet deals with something else.
In order for the quality of a student's skill to improve, then this student must be in relationship with something else. This is a fact. Perhaps, that student is in relation to a sparring partner, an instructor, or an ideal model in terms of movement. In all of these cases, growth happens through the act of relationship. Without relationship, there is no growth. This relationship allows for self-evaluation, questioning, experimentation, and refinement. Understanding this is vital if a martial arts student wants to improve.
When a group of people decide to come together and work to help each other improve, then there is a really wonderful opportunity made possible for each person in that arrangement. One person learns and applies that technique while working with another. That person learns this technique and finds ways to counter it or to apply it in a way that has not been explored by the group before. One person has an idea and brings it to the group and they collectively look at it, offer criticism constructively, support the parts that are workable, and distill it down to it's essence. This is, ideally, a group of people that set aside ego and pure self-interest in order to arrive at something new and better - to grow. Rarely, do many of us in day to day life have a place where we can go to do these things - to learn about what we love and to learn about ourselves. This process is often tumultuous; growth is often done through stressful situations that make a person feel vulnerable emotionally. Dedication to this community means that you will see through your own growth process with an indomitable spirit and to be there for the others in the school as a dedicated friend while they go through their own process.
Unfortunately, not everyone that comes to a martial arts school understands this. Many people come in looking for a belt, looking to have their own ego stroked, or without any real interest in connecting with others. These people cycle through over time. They will be around for a little while and then fade out. They will either feel slighted and leave, become delusional about their own skills, or become dojo-hoppers and always look for another group of people to train with while not really taking those relationships and hard work seriously. I'm sure it's a variation on people having commitment issues in life. While it is always sad to see wasted potential, it is not for me to decide if they will stay or go. It is my job to regulate this environment and make sure that people adhere to a proper sense of community. If they do not, then I have to get involved and help regulate things. Sometimes, it feels like my job is only stressful in having to manage the behaviors of students - often, the adult ones. If my job were only to teach techniques, then people could just look up videos online. A martial arts school is about community and the people that understand this fact thoroughly are really a joy to be around both in and out of the school. I try to treat each of them like the treasure they are.
There are times, unfortunately, when this dedication has to be questioned. I feel I need to say this because it would be disingenuous of me not to mention that I have left two schools during my martial arts journey. While I have always tried to leave the vast majorities of the bridges intact in my life, there are a few that had to be burned along the way. Both ended because the instructional environment became unhealthy. Head instructors at these schools began expecting things from me that were inappropriate. At no time should a martial arts instructor have influence over your personal relationships outside of classes. At no time should an instructor expect adherence to their religious beliefs in order to progress in their school. No one should have to tolerate having to turn over immense amounts of their own personal time to help the instructor out to the detriment of his or her own life and home. No one should have to tolerate fraudulent behavior from an instructor. No one should ever need to take on responsibilities for their instructor that are inappropriate and due to that instructor's lack of interest and ill-attention. I don't regret working with these groups and individuals. I look back at many of my experiences with them as formative and very worthwhile. Still, these environments changed from the kinds that gave me a good experience to something that was either unhealthy and unsustainable or blatantly unethical and cult-like. All relationships have to respect boundaries and all life deserves to be respected and to not be harmed by another carelessly. If the people in the school aren't ethical and accountable, then find a school that is. If you are in a situation where you are thinking about leaving a school, make sure you consider the issue causing the tension. Sometimes, it is hard to see what is a problem with the school and what is the tension in your own growth. If the school members and the instructor are behaving ethically yet you find yourself upset or angry with them, then look in the mirror before turning your back on your school. If you are sure that the group is unhealthy and unwilling to examine their behavior, then leave and find a group that is. With that, try not to drag their name through the mud when you leave (notice, I have not mentioned which schools with which I studied or which one was engaged in any particular behavior). Know that all people are fallible and everyone is going through life as best they can. Check your resentment, pack your equipment, and move on to greener pastures if you must. You never know what the future will have in store and leaving may actually give you credibility if you do it without malice. If you must leave, do it quickly and quietly. There's no shame in that.
In looking at the need for relationship in order to foster growth for an individual as well as a group, it becomes clear to see the importance of each member of a school to be dedicated to each other. This dedication is not divisive between schools, but rather to the group of people working with you directly. This ethical tenet of martial arts is the practical application of being devoted to the greater community, respecting your teachers, and being a dedicated friend. In doing this, the relationships in the school can act as a mirror for each person to understand their own strengths, faults, challenges, and triumphs. Without dedication to each other, this growth will not be possible.
No comments:
Post a Comment